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Why I Don’t Drink Wine

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First of all, I don’t want to offend anybody. I just want to tell you why I don’t participate in anything related to cocktails, margaritas, wine, or any other type of alcoholic drinks. I don’t “Like” them or “Share” them, and I thought you might like to know Why.

Secondly, I don’t think I am better than the people who do drink wine and other alcoholic adult beverages.

Thirdly, I have good friends who drink on occasion.

Fourthly, I have plenty of my own other faults and failures. I’m not perfect, nor do I claim to be.

Fifthly, I do drink caffeine in coffee, and eat it in chocolate. I don’t care for soda pop, although I do have it occasionally. Probably I drink soda like most people drink wine!

wine in a glass with sunset in background

Okay. Please let me be honest here. I am concerned. I am concerned for all these moms who are suddenly home all day with their children— home schooling because they have to— and they are posting about drinking wine “all day” and how “the teacher got fired for drinking the first day on the job.” Now I know that part of it is a joke, but I’m concerned that part of it may be real. Why? Because I see pictures (prior to Coronavirus) of moms out partying. It’s not just moms that I’m concerned about (but this staying at home thing has seemed to really bring it out.)

So I’m going to use the phrase, “I don’t drink wine because….” and when I use the word wine, I mean all alcoholic beverages.

I don’t drink wine because I don’t want it to ever control me, not even a little bit.

Even a small amount of consumption affects your reactive responses. I want to be alert as I can be at all times (except when I am napping). What if my children or a neighbor needs me suddenly? What if there is a fire? If I am napping, I can instantly wake up, jump up, and think coherently. But you can’t just snap out of being controlled by a substance, at will.

I don’t drink wine because it is expensive.

Alcohol is expensive. (So are lots of other drinks that are not alcoholic, like energy drinks, and I don’t drink them either.) Alcohol has put plenty of regular people into debt. Imagine how much richer you would be if you never spent a penny more on alcohol. Think of how you could help someone out if you donated that money to a food pantry instead (or bought toilet paper for somebody).

I don’t drink wine because then I can never accidentally get drunk.

If I don’t drink wine, I will never be drunk. I will never accidentally drive without realizing how much I’ve imbibed, and I will never accidentally kill someone as a drunk driver.

I don’t drink wine because I don’t want to.

I’ve never tasted it that I am aware of, and I don’t want to. Most alcohol stinks whenever I have had a whiff of someone else’s drink. Even if it might taste good, I am too aware of the possible dangers to ever want to try it.

I don’t drink wine because I don’t want my children to drink.

My kids can never sneak my adult drinks, if there are none to sneak. If I teach my kids not to ever drink even a little bit (and I do teach them that), then there is a good chance that my children won’t become alcoholics or other substance abusers when they become adults.

I don’t drink wine because I don’t want to die of an alcohol related disease.

An alcohol related disease like liver cancer is preventable, by not drinking in the first place. There are lots of things I can’t protect myself from in life, but this one is a no-brainer for me.

Conclusion

I said I was concerned. I am. I’m concerned that people don’t realize they are playing with fire when they drink socially. My opinion is that alcoholic beverages like wine that are drunken occasionally, are a small fire that is waiting for a chance to turn into a blaze you can’t control, in one way or another. If you don’t play with fire, you can’t get burned, as the saying goes.

I understand that people might like to drink wine because it relaxes them. Being with children all day is stressful, and they need something to relax them and take away their anxiety. My answer to that? Try something else like walking outside. Try a long bath or a long shower. Try drinking hot chocolate instead. Start a hobby, like crocheting. Try planting a flower outside, or calling a friend to talk to. Call me. I’ll be your friend.

If your reasons for drinking wine are worth more to you than the dangers that I have highlighted, that is your choice. But please consider what I have said in concern for you and your health and your loved ones.

If you think that I am “missing out” because I don’t drink wine– please don’t be sorry for me! This is one thing that I am glad to be missing out on.

Now chocolate…. that’s another story.

p.s. After writing this article someone suggested that I google “mommy wine culture.” I didn’t realize it had a name. This is one of the articles I found by Cyber Parent.

p.s.s. If this article has touched a nerve and you realize you might have a problem, please seek professional help. If you don’t know where to start, feel free to send me a message.

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13 Comments

  1. Thanks for sharing this message. I totally agree as a 69 year old mother of 2 girls (who are now 40 and drink very little). I never drank anything, didn’t like the taste, grew up in a home with Godly parents who didn’t drink. I really struggled w/why…others drank “responsibly” but we didn’t. I got married to a person whose father drank *responsibly” or so I thought. But that was untrue; so my spouse did exactly what his father did. Finally, after 8 years I made him make the decision to stop and he did slow down. But kept up “social” drinking for another 6 years, until our kids could see how it could control you. He gave it up completely and never looked back and passed that heritage on to our girls. Follow the Money; Alcohol drives everything in our society and I really hate those “Cute Bad Moms who drink” Terrible influence.

  2. Good article, thank you. While previously married to an abuser and alcoholic, and the mom to a handicapped child, I did not drink as obviously someone needed to be clear headed. It is sad how acceptable drinking has become without knowing the rest of the story. Makes one think about choices and consequences.

    1. I’m so glad this article was an encouragement to you! Would you consider sharing it in your circles even though it may cause some difficult comments?

  3. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this. All legitimate points. Except maybe that you don’t want your children to drink. My parents are tee-totalers which created a big curiosity for me when I went away to college. I drank way too much there. Now I am much more responsible and only drink socially – maybe one to two drinks a month. But I hope our responsibility with it will take the mystery out of it for my daughter. But we are all just doing the best we can and there are lots of other influences on our kids. We can only pray and trust them to God. Visiting you from the tune in thurs link up.

  4. I agree. All good points. When we had children we decided that the best way to ensure that our children didn’t go down that path like so many we know is to not pave the way.

  5. I have to agree with you. I don’t drink, either, and it concerns me how wine has become like Dr. Pepper recently. No matter what social media site you’re on, there’s a mom joking about her wine habit. Personally I think it’s sad to behave that way in front of your kids. Imagine how they must feel! I would feel like I’m so bad to be around that mommy has to drink to stand me. What a terrible message.

  6. Very well put and I agree with you 100%! My daughter is a county attorney and she has told me that during this pandemic, domestic violence has risen phenomenally. I’m sure that alcohol and other substance abuse plays a big role in that. It is sad when this stay at home time should actually be a time of bonding and the making of good and loving memories. Thanks for sharing your standards!

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